I feel I should say something but I can’t ?? :) but here we are with you telling us what we can and can’t do about because someone inferred to you in a fairly harmless ( well context is everything) about what you can and can’t do when in fact all they were doing was asking about a kilt ?
You’re proving my point. There are nuanced ethnic and gender issues at play that you don’t see, but as a rule of thumb, you never have a right to walk up to a stranger and demand an explanation for how they’re dressed. Just because she started with a compliment doesn’t mean it wasn’t a clear microagression.
I guess we differ there :) many people come up to me and ask about my shoes or a jumper. It’s no problem for me . We all think we hold the sacred flame . I guess you’ll never really know why she asked . Let the sun shine in I say :)
Yeah, we do differ. I’m transfemme and I’ve been wearing kilts with knee high women’s socks for half a decade. I get comments from people pretty much every time I leave the house. Most are nice, some are not, but it’s the ones who make an effort to enter my space and begin a line of questioning who make me feel unsafe. Maybe someone who reads this will think twice before interrupting a stranger’s day with their “harmless questions.” Trans folks deal with a hostile world every day, so it doesn’t matter what your intent is or whether it wouldn’t bother you. As I originally stated, a quick compliment is fine, but demanding an explanation for a stranger’s appearance or dress is just not ok.
I don’t interrupt people anyway. I avoid aggression in all its manifestations... And you’re preaching to the converted here . My point was something about though it can dark world for anyone .., blah blah ... let there be light... blah blah soapbox
I feel I should say something but I can’t ?? :) but here we are with you telling us what we can and can’t do about because someone inferred to you in a fairly harmless ( well context is everything) about what you can and can’t do when in fact all they were doing was asking about a kilt ?
Relax
You’re proving my point. There are nuanced ethnic and gender issues at play that you don’t see, but as a rule of thumb, you never have a right to walk up to a stranger and demand an explanation for how they’re dressed. Just because she started with a compliment doesn’t mean it wasn’t a clear microagression.
I guess we differ there :) many people come up to me and ask about my shoes or a jumper. It’s no problem for me . We all think we hold the sacred flame . I guess you’ll never really know why she asked . Let the sun shine in I say :)
Gender issues? I know about gender issues ... :)
Anyway I’m not trying to be contrary ... I suppose the opposite... just joining in to the conversation
Cheers.
Yeah, we do differ. I’m transfemme and I’ve been wearing kilts with knee high women’s socks for half a decade. I get comments from people pretty much every time I leave the house. Most are nice, some are not, but it’s the ones who make an effort to enter my space and begin a line of questioning who make me feel unsafe. Maybe someone who reads this will think twice before interrupting a stranger’s day with their “harmless questions.” Trans folks deal with a hostile world every day, so it doesn’t matter what your intent is or whether it wouldn’t bother you. As I originally stated, a quick compliment is fine, but demanding an explanation for a stranger’s appearance or dress is just not ok.
I don’t interrupt people anyway. I avoid aggression in all its manifestations... And you’re preaching to the converted here . My point was something about though it can dark world for anyone .., blah blah ... let there be light... blah blah soapbox